who pays for the meal on the first date ?
Who pays for the meal on the first date depends on a lot of different variables. Where in the world are you? How did you meet, who asked out who? How big is your pay check? All I can do is bring you my perspective. My opinion and my way of doing it.
I assume you came here because you were worried that the date might cost you… and It might. If you’ve finally gotten that beautiful girl at the office to go out with you after several attempts. If you want to be the gentleman then you are paying.
What if the roles would be reversed, you should have her pay. At least split the bill. This might’ve just confused you further so let me go through my reasoning behind this statement. First of all I’ll start by telling you a story about a friend of mine who was homeless in Japan for a couple of weeks. Let’s call him John. The story about John has everything to do with first dates and you will know exactly what I mean shortly.
John woke up on a sunny day in august in a hotel in Hamamatsu which is a small city a couple of hours south of Tokyo. The thing you don’t know about John is that he couldn’t afford staying at a hotel. The 200$ spent on that hotel was not a choice of his but rather a necessity. You see, god had decided that John had to stay inside for three days… how did he do that you ask. God had grabbed one of his typhoons and sent it John’s way for the weekend as it would cause some ruckus. God has humour like this, he thought it would be fun if John had to be homeless for a bit.
By missing his train due to the typhoon. By spending his last resources on the hotel and not bringing his phone to Hamamatsu. He had no choice but to become homeless. You might be wondering why the fuck? ‘Who pays for the meal on the first date?’ Has anything to do with being homeless in Japan but just you wait. I’ll get to that.
As a homeless man John faced severe psychological pain, like the feeling of death. Since neither you, me nor John has ever died… we won’t know if it’s actually like dying, but let’s pretend that it is.
This severe pain gave John the temporary superpower of survival instincts. With this acquired super power he could pretty much do anything to survive. This includes what many of us would judge as unethical. John did not care at this point, his number one priority was survival. He did many things that most people would not do in a normal situation and I’ll let you in on the details of one of them.
Letting her pay
John started talking to every girl he could find but lacking the skill of Japanese he failed. Nothing seemed to work at first. He spent hours and hours roaming around hunting for prey. John knew that if this didn’t work, then nothing would.
Since John had many years of experience in the art of seduction. He finally found a girl willing to go out with him right there and then. After the most delicious dinner he’s ever had in his life he decided to be blunt. He told her the truth “I don’t have any money or a place to stay right now”.
Being the charming man he is, saying it with the level of confidence that he did. She felt for him and since she wasn’t by any means poor. She paid both for the dinner as well as for the hotel they both spent the night at.
John found this to be a comfortable way of being homeless. So he kept doing similar things until his next pay check finally entered his account. The take away from this story is that girls don’t mind paying for you if you have a good reason. If you give them a good time then they will pay without second thought. And yes, this is just like prostitution.
This got you no further to the answer of ‘who pays for the meal on the first date?’ Did it?
The answer is that there is no answer, while most girls will assume that you pay or at least split the bill. They will rarely take the bill and pay it without asking you first. In many cultures it would be seen as rude to not pay the bill. While in this modern day and age.
If I can afford paying for her I will, If not then I will split the bill. Letting the girl pay for our first date feels humiliating to me, if there are other options I will avoid that. Be a gentleman and pay for the girl. Some seduction experts say that you must not pay for a girl before you sleep with her. And tho I see the point, when it comes to an actual date I disagree.