Dating

how to approach a girl you like for the first time

how to approach a girl you like for the first time


How to approach a girl you like for the first time is a question with a lot of different answers. Some of them very difficult while other very simple. I prefer the simple answers since why make it harder than it has to be?
I will walk you through the basic steps of the process of how to approach a girl you like for the first time. Assuming the goal of the approach being to pick her up or make future plans to get to meet her again. It doesn’t matter if this is a girl you often see or a complete stranger you see for the first time. Often the same rules apply.


Pickup lines


First I want to make it clear that pickup lines are very overrated. Oftentimes a simple Hi does the trick. You want to provide some motivation for approaching her. Or in other words a reason why you are speaking with her. This is an important step in how to approach a girl you like for the first time but you don’t have to worry too much about it. A reason such as “I just wanted to talk to you” is often enough. If you wish to seem more natural you might say something about the surroundings or come up with a question. This might be something in line with asking for directions. Asking for the time or asking where she got that cool iPhone case. Often girls will be happy to be approached so don’t worry too much about the initial phrases.


Conversation topics


When it comes to conversation topics you want to prepare some interesting questions. Some of my favourites if I’m in a new city is “What’s one thing I can’t miss out on doing in this city?” Or something like that. This will give you a better understanding of what type of things they like doing. It might even provide an opportunity for asking them out for that restaurant they like or that famous aquarium.
When it comes to how to approach a girl you like for the first time the conversation after the approach is the most important part. Preparing a couple questions that are sure to spark interesting conversation is important. especially if you’re not a natural conversationalist.


Body language


Your body language should be relaxed, confident and casual. Don’t be too forward, especially not if it’s in the middle of the day on the street. Make sure you seem confident and calm. You can read more about a good dating body language here.


Exchanging contact info


Exchanging contact info is pretty basic, just ask for her contacts. Often this will backfire if you didn’t build enough rapport beforehand and she might ghost you. You want to make sure she is actually interested in you and enjoying the conversation. And even asking her out or making plans before asking for contacts. Read more about building rapport here.


Making plans


When making plans you want to make sure it sounds interesting enough for her to take time out of her daily routine to actually spend time with you. Often just asking her out for coffee is enough if she’s already interested in you. In other cases you might need to present a silly idea. Like watering cacti in the nearby zoo or going for an adventure to make her interested in going out with you. It doesn’t have to be a realistic plan either. Actually fulfilling the plan is less important than sparking her interest. Offering to travel around the world together would work. When she says yes you can say that you need to get to know each other first and ask her out for coffee. The purpose is only to make her fantasise about spending time with you rather than actually making plans.


how to approach a girl you like for the first time is as you can see not a difficult topic. This post is thus very short. The approach itself is often about having the actual confidence to pull it off. You can read more about building your confidence and self-esteem here. Good luck with your approaching.

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4 comments

[…] Approaching someone you haven’t spoken to might not seem easy at first. And it’s not the answer to how do i know if a guy likes me when we don’t even speak to each other. Despite this, the only way to know the true answer is to ask in person. Asking if he likes you right away though might not be the optimal approach. Rather start by becoming friends and getting to know each other. There’s a chance you won’t like him in person anyway. […]

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